How to Overcome the Persistent Feeling of Running Out of Time
Info from Dr. Gpt:
For a client who doesn’t have a very demanding life but constantly feels like they are running out of time, it’s important to explore the deeper emotional and psychological factors that might be contributing to this persistent sense of urgency. Here are several key areas to consider, along with practical strategies that may help the client understand and address this feeling:
1. Explore the Source of the Urgency
The feeling of running out of time often reflects unresolved internal pressure or unmet expectations, rather than actual time constraints. In this case, it’s worth exploring where this sense of urgency might be coming from:
Fear of missed opportunities: The client may feel regret about decisions they’ve made or worry about missed chances in life, leading to the belief that they need to "catch up" or make up for lost time.
Existential concerns: The sense of running out of time could be connected to a deeper, existential anxiety about life, aging, or death. This is common when people reflect on their life purpose or legacy and wonder if they’ve done enough with their time.
Cultural or societal pressures: Sometimes, people internalize cultural or societal expectations about what they "should" have achieved by a certain age, which can create an ongoing sense of urgency, even if their current life isn’t particularly demanding.
Advice: Encourage the client to reflect on whether they are holding themselves to unspoken expectations or comparing their life to societal norms that may not align with their true desires. Journaling or talking through these thoughts can help them uncover underlying fears or pressures.
2. Challenge Perfectionism and Unrealistic Expectations
A constant feeling of running out of time can be driven by perfectionism or the belief that there is a "right" way to live. The client may feel that they aren’t doing enough or achieving enough, despite having a relatively calm life.
Perfectionism: The client might have internal standards that are too high or unrealistic, which leads to feeling like they are always falling short. Even when life isn’t busy, they might feel like they’re not using time efficiently or productively.
Unrealistic expectations: The client might be overestimating what they "should" be accomplishing and underestimating the value of the things they are doing, creating a sense of failure or urgency.
Advice: Help the client reframe their expectations. Encourage them to evaluate what success or accomplishment truly means to them, outside of societal norms or pressures. Remind them that their life doesn’t have to be filled with productivity to be meaningful.
3. Practice Mindfulness to Anchor in the Present
The feeling of running out of time is often tied to future-focused thinking—worrying about what needs to be done or achieved. Mindfulness can help the client focus on the present moment and reduce the anxious feelings associated with time slipping away.
Mindfulness practices: Encourage the client to practice simple mindfulness techniques, such as mindful breathing, body scanning, or grounding exercises, to help them focus on the present rather than constantly thinking about the future or what’s next.
Advice: Invite the client to start with small, daily practices where they intentionally slow down, savor the present moment, and remind themselves that it’s okay to enjoy life as it is, without the constant pressure to be somewhere else or do more.
4. Reevaluate the Client’s Definition of a Meaningful Life
For many people, the sense of running out of time is tied to deeper questions of purpose and meaning. The client may feel like they haven’t yet lived the life they wanted or fulfilled their potential, even if they don’t have many external pressures.
Life purpose: Work with the client to explore their values and what makes life meaningful to them. What does it mean to live a fulfilling life? Does their current life align with their values, and if not, how can they make small adjustments to bring more meaning into their day-to-day experience?
Accomplishment: Help the client shift the focus from external markers of success (such as career milestones or productivity) to internal fulfillment. Sometimes, this can involve redefining what it means to live a good life or to "use time well."
Advice: Have the client list activities or experiences that make them feel fulfilled or grounded. This can help them see that they are already living a meaningful life, even if it’s not filled with traditional measures of success.
5. Address Underlying Anxiety or Existential Concerns
For some people, the sense of running out of time is linked to existential anxiety—the fear of death, aging, or the finite nature of life. These concerns can manifest as a constant sense of urgency, even when there’s no immediate external pressure.
Aging or death anxiety: If the client is struggling with the idea of time passing or aging, this might be more about their fear of mortality or their relationship with aging. This type of anxiety is common and can lead to a preoccupation with how time is being used.
Existential reflection: Help the client engage in reflective conversations about what it means to accept the passage of time and live fully, even with the knowledge that time is finite. Existential therapy or journaling can be helpful here.
Advice: Encourage the client to explore their relationship with time and mortality in a compassionate way. Instead of focusing on what hasn’t been done, they can shift toward gratitude for what has been experienced and cultivate a mindset of appreciating the present.
6. Introduce Time-Management with Self-Compassion
If the client feels like they are running out of time but doesn’t have many demands, it may help to introduce gentle time-management strategies. However, these strategies should be rooted in self-compassion, rather than pressure to do more.
Structure time intentionally: Encourage the client to set small, meaningful goals each day that align with their values. These goals should focus on quality, not quantity—such as spending time on hobbies, relationships, or self-care—rather than filling the day with obligations.
Celebrate small wins: Help the client recognize and celebrate even the smallest moments of progress or fulfillment. This can shift their mindset from "I’m running out of time" to "I’m spending my time on things that matter."
Advice: Instead of viewing time as something to "manage" or "run out of," encourage the client to see time as something to enjoy and savor. They can set goals that reflect self-care, creativity, or connection rather than productivity.
7. Practice Gratitude and Reflection
Sometimes, the feeling of running out of time comes from focusing on what’s missing or what hasn’t been accomplished. Practicing gratitude can help shift attention to what’s already present and good in life.
Gratitude practice: Encourage the client to develop a gratitude practice, where they regularly reflect on what they are grateful for, the small pleasures in life, or the progress they’ve made. This can help them realize that they have more time and fulfillment than they might initially think.
Daily reflection: Journaling at the end of the day about what went well, what they appreciated, or how they felt can also help slow down the perception that time is slipping away.
Advice: Help the client cultivate a daily or weekly gratitude routine. This can involve writing down three things they are grateful for each day or reflecting on moments they’ve enjoyed, even in a calm or quiet life.
Final Thoughts:
For your client, the feeling of running out of time likely stems from internal pressures, unresolved fears, or unmet expectations, rather than actual external demands. By helping them understand where this feeling comes from and guiding them toward more mindful, self-compassionate practices, they can begin to release the urgency and enjoy life more fully. Encouraging them to reflect on their values, engage in mindfulness, and practice gratitude will help them shift from feeling rushed to feeling grounded and present in the time they have.
