You know those giant stage canes used to yank performers off when they overstay their welcome? That’s how my mind treats my thoughts. The moment something starts forming, it gets pulled away—sometimes two thoughts per second. The chaos is overwhelming, and when I notice it happening, another defense kicks in: shutting everything down completely. What’s going on here? Why does my mind do this? And can I ever get it to stop?

It’s a strange feeling—the moment I finally acknowledge a loud, ignored thought in my mind. The noise vanishes, leaving behind an almost physical sensation of space, as if my ears have opened up to a new quiet. Does anyone else experience this? Is there a name for it?

For years, I didn’t know what to make of these moments. They felt like a sudden drop in pressure, a shift in awareness that was both freeing and unsettling. As I’ve explored trauma, embodiment, and the ways the mind protects itself, I’ve come to see this as a kind of cognitive release—a moment when tension gives way to clarity.

This blog is my attempt to put words to an experience that few people seem to talk about. If you’ve felt it too, you’re not alone.

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